


Never Home Again

by Katraa



Category: Subarashiki Kono Sekai | The World Ends With You
Genre: Angst, Friendship, Gen, Headcanon, M/M, Only very faintly implied pairing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-24
Updated: 2013-10-24
Packaged: 2017-12-30 07:59:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1016095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katraa/pseuds/Katraa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>New York was meant to be a temporary thing.  Neku had planned to spend the summer visiting his Aunt and engrossing himself in the culture before school ended and he had to start thinking about the future.  Of course, that was before he was accosted in the midst of Times Square.  Apparently Conductors are the prime-rib of Music for Noise.  Who knew?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Home Again

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally written for a friend's birthday back in 2010. I may eventually add another chapter to this. It's been sitting on my livejournal for over three and a half years now and I just wanted to get it out there.

There were several differences between the subways of Shibuya and New York.  One: they were far more rickety, jerking to the left and then far right directly afterward.  Two: there was never any music blaring over the old and rusty intercoms. The only sounds were the colourful street performers, the far and few that there were, anyway.  And three:  Neku Saukaraba never ran the chance of running into a certain, smug fair skinned deity.  New York was meant to be a temporary thing--he'd be there for the summer and then return in the fall to start his second to last year of secondary schooling.  Neku would stay with his eccentric aunt, study music and art, and absorb the western world for all it was worth.  His aunt had been ecstatic when approached with the idea;  Neku and his family rarely traveled out of Tokyo.  The chance to see her nephew was too good of an offer to pass up.  She had arrived two hours early to JFK international to wait for him, arms wide open and smile brighter than even the terminal lights.  It had been five years since she last saw him and the change was drastic and drastically obvious.  Neku had begun to carry himself with a different swagger-something completely his own.  He looked as if he carried the burden of millions on his shoulders.  He said little to no words on the ride from JFK to Eightieth Street and Fourth Avenue.  When they finally reached their destination, Neku followed his aunt faithfully off the subway and up onto the bustling streets of New York.     That was where it all began.

That is, he thought he heard a distinct whirring in the distance.  He did his best to ignore it.     

But who could ignore destiny?  

••••••••••••  

Times Square was as crowded as Neku had expected.  A plethora of people paraded and jostled through the throng; some with goals and sights in mind, others aimlessly whittling away the hours.   Millions of conversations were lingering in the air, creating a cacophony of sounds and voices. 

It was hard to make it from point A to point B, but he was trying his best.  His aunt was downtown and promised to meet up with him later.  So until then he had time to do whatever he pleased. And that was what New York was best known for; wandering.

The years seemed to blur as he made his way through the crowd.  It felt like yesterday that he had been fumbling through Shibuya, through Scramble Crossing, fighting for his life.  And now?  Now he was alive again, across the ocean, in a whole new mess of people.  But the two ‘squares’ were reminiscent of one another, and he didn’t feel quite as homesick.

Still, there was no Beat, no Shiki, and no Rhyme by his side to traverse through the cluster of people.  No, here in the Big Apple, he was to combat the crowds alone.

But that was just part of growing up, right?

You get past fifteen, flirt with seventeen, and start becoming an adult.  You start doing things on your own and start opening your eyes to see the world for what it’s worth.  It was gravely different.

But what was familiar was the weight of purple headphones over his ears, blocking out the majority of the world around him.  His plan was to get a coffee, observe for a bit, and then possibly do some shopping.  Before he left Tokyo, Beat had told him they had an amazing store in New York City that sold every single magazine and comic book you could think of, as well as the best skateboarding equipment.  Neku was determined to check it out later, but for now he just needed some time to settle in.

He had all summer, right?

A long, slender arm coiled around his shoulders without warning.  At first, Neku brushed it off as just another passersby getting too close and rubbing up against him, but when the arm stuck, his first instinct was to flinch away.  When he did, he looked hurriedly over his shoulder.  Standing amidst the thinning crowd was a tall woman.  She had the stereotypical New York glamour-look—flawless makeup, brown curly hair that went nearly to her waist, stunning eyes, clothes that were probably more expensive than Neku’s schooling, and a smirk that bore right through him and drilled a hole into the sidewalk.  She looked to be in her twenties, and even if she wasn’t, she didn’t look a day over twenty-one.

“…Sorry,” Neku felt compelled to say in a raised murmur, figuring that perhaps it was his fault he had run into her.  Or… whatever the hell that had just transpired.

The woman clicked her tongue against her teeth, head tilted to the right.  She smiled, almost sinfully, and then shrugged.  “Why are you apologizing for that?  Totally my fault,” she all but purred before her gaze turned a fraction more serious.  “You do know you’re not supposed to be here, right?”

“…Here?”  Neku tossed her a flat look, hand instinctively touching his headphone.   

“Yeah, here.  Are you deaf?  Oh right, you have headphones on,” she complained, standing akimbo before taking a step closer.  “You, me, the nearest Starbucks, now.”

“Listen, I—”  Neku began, growing slightly irritated, before the Music blasting through his ears grew to an uncomfortable volume.  The teen fumbled to turn it down, but it refused to budge. Even turning the lanyard off didn’t do anything.  And besides, the Music sounded a bit… disjointed.  Incomplete, messed up, misplaced.  “Damn, what’s…”

“Coffee.  Before I fall asleep from a lack of caffeine and let the Noise have you,” she sighed in exasperation before snatching the wincing boy’s wrist.

Without his consent, Neku was dragged down the street to the conveniently placed Starbucks. After all, how could he struggle after the iciness in the pit of his stomach appeared upon hearing the word 'Noise'.

 ••••••••••••

Once inside the cozy coffee shop, and seated in the far corner, the mysterious woman tossed Neku a grin.  She had already ordered a Frappucino and was currently nursing the drink for all it was worth. 

“Listen, I don’t know who you are, or what you want, but I’m not interested, okay?” Neku grumbled, slouching back in his chair.  The level of awkward had spiked, and his mind had already begun plotting escape routes.  Clearly she was a delusional, crazy woman.    He had been warned about those types online before coming here.

“Neku Sakuraba,” she sighed, tongue playing with the straw. “Shibuya, right?”

  “…How did you know that?”  A scowl.

“I’d be stupid if I didn’t, kid,” she huffed and leaned back in the chair, setting the drink down for the time-being.  “You’re not supposed to be here, like I said.  It’s kind of… you know, forbidden and all.  Unless you have a pass.  But those are hard to come by—And hey!  Stop giving me that look, kid!”

“…You’re not making any sense, you realize?” Neku complained and flicked his gaze off to the right.  “Can you just explain to me why you know my name?  Do you know my Aunt or something?”

“No,” she said slowly, as if thinking about it.  After a second or two, her face grew alit.  “But I do know you!  … Well, kind of.  Heard about you, anyhow.  Things get around the globe fast nowadays with phones.”

“That’s great…” 

“…And you still have no idea what I’m talking about.  Are you stupid?”

Neku frowned and made a move to stand, trying to head for the door.

“Fine, I’ll start at the beginning, jeez.”  She sucked in a deep breath before extending her hand, her bangle-bracelets clattering when she did such, stopping Neku momentarily from leaving.    “Name’s Emily Ashlin.  Pleased to meet you.”  When Neku eyed her hand suspiciously, her lips grew into a thin line.  “Oh come on, us Conductors are supposed to be nice to one another.  You don’t have to be so cold.”

Neku, who had taken to taking a sip of the water he had been forced to order, spit out the contents of his mouth into his hand.  And then he started choking, coughing out the words,  “Excuse me….”

“…What?  Cold?   Isn’t that a common saying? Do the Japanese not say that?”  Her brows wrinkled.

“No, not that,” Neku murmured and grabbed for a napkin, face flushing.   “The other thing.  What you said.  Conductors?...”

“…Uh, duh.  Did the trip over here make your mind turn into jello?”  She giggled faintly and shook her head.

“You’re…”  Neku blinked and out of habit, spared a glance down at his hand.  Nope, nothing. “What are you talking about?”

“You are a Conductor, right?  I mean, the Noise were practically raping you out there.”  She tilted her thumb back towards the way they had come from.   “If I hadn’t been around, kid, you would have been Erased.  Or got a serious case of depression.  Either or.”

“You know about…”  Neku trailed off, head pounding.  Nothing was making sense and he closed his eyes, the room suddenly spinning.  Too much.  Too fast. Had she not uttered the phrases Noise, Erased, and Conductor in such quick succession, he likely wouldn't have believed her, but not it seemed too hard to deny. He felt sick. Leaving was no longer an option, was it? “So you’re telling me you’re… A Reaper?”

“…Yeah.  Aren’t all Conductors?”  She reached out to flick his forehead.  “You’re a weird pick for a Conductor, kid.  You’re acting like you’ve never heard any of this before.”

“I haven’t!”  Neku all but snapped in his own defense, face red from anger.  “I’m not anything at all.  I’m just here visiting my Aunt—”

“Your Composer didn’t send you?”  She seemed disappointed.  “He’s the young one, right? Really pretty.  Well, really hot, actually.  Ah, if only there weren't so many issues with Cross-City romances.”  She trailed off, decidedly wistful.

Neku twitched.   Just hearing the word ‘Composer’ made his blood boil and his stomach knot. He didn’t need constant reminders of the Game, let alone terms like that.  The Game had been a chapter of his life that he had closed and sealed off for good.  Now was not a time to return to it. Not now and not ever.

“Why did you think I was a Conductor, again?”

“…Your Music.   You’re practically beaming off light from your Soul.”  Emily had taken to drinking her coffee again, looking bored.  “You are, right?  I mean, if not, I don’t get why the Noise is after some kid—Wait.  If you’re not, how do you know about any of this? Are you just trying to be a jerk by playing stupid?”

She was talking too fast. 

“…I played a few times,” Neku answered vaguely, figuring lying wasn't going to get him anywhere when New York's Conductor was breathing down his neck and claiming that the Noise was allegedly hot on his trail. He looked down at the table, forlorn.  “It’s no big deal.  I just don’t want to go back to that.”

“…Poor kid,” Emily said, looking down at her phone on the table.  “Listen, I’ll give my Composer a ring, we’ll work this out, get you on a plane back to Shibuya, and everything will be all peachy.”

“Back to Shibuya?!  But I just got here!   I’m here for the summer!”  Neku didn’t realize he had raised his voice until a few people shot glares in his general direction.  Awkwardly, he tried to diffuse through his chair and into the ground.  Anything to escape this embarrassment and confusion. Oddly, science didn't work like that.

“…You have to go back.  You’re not safe here with the Noise like that.”

“Why?”  Deadpan.

“Because your Music is foreign,” Emily hummed and poked her straw across the table at him. “The Noise doesn’t identify it with anything.  Therefore, you’re an intruder.  An infection, kind of. A Bad Note.  So you must be Erased.”

Neku scrunched his nose up some.  “Then why don’t tourists get killed?”

“Because they’re not Conductors and their frequencies aren’t that high.  I thought that was elementary,” Emily murmured and shifted the straw back into her drink.  “…You really don’t know anything, do you?”

“What gave it away?” Neku grumbled.  “Can you just, please, tell me you’re joking?   That you were set up to do this?”

“I don’t joke about things like Erasure,” Emily said.  “Bottom line, kid. Either you risk getting erased, or you go back to Shibuya.”

His choices really didn’t appeal to him. And the 'kid' business was starting to grate on his last weak nerve.  “…But I just got here,” he repeated under his breath, looking annoyed.  “And besides,” he lowered his voice, “I’m not dead, so how can I be a Conductor?  I didn’t even agree to the job.”

“Sounds like a personal problem,” Emily answered and tossed him a wink.  “Call your Composer and ask what’s up?”

Neku frowned.  “I don’t know his number.”

“Sounds like another personal problem.”

Neku’s frown depend.  “He…”  killed me “Wouldn’t answer anyhow. The details don't matter.  I’m not a Conductor, so you don’t have to worry about me messing up your city, okay?”

“…If you say so.”

“Can I go now?”  He was going to be late for his Aunt.

“Uh-huh.”  She blinked, as if suddenly having an epiphany.  “Oh wait!  No, no you can’t!”

Neku’s hopes fell as quickly as they had soared.  “What the hell do you mean?  You can’t keep me hostage here.”

“Stop being a drama queen,” Emily said and opened her phone.   She scanned it for a few moments before passing it over the table.  The phone looked like an ordinary BlackBerry, except that the names of the Contacts were all places.  Paris, London, New York, Chicago – Shibuya.  Neku eyed it.    “Well just don’t stare at it, kid, take it.  Call it.”

“I didn’t know Shibuya had its own hotline,” Neku said, suspiciously looking up to Emily.

“…Are you always this intolerable?  Just take the phone and call so we can figure out what’s going on with you,” she all but growled and jabbed the phone further across the table.

“Fine!”

If it meant getting her to go away.  If it meant getting to stay in New York with his Aunt and have fun.  If it meant the Noise would go away.  If it meant he’d be able to get that sinking feeling in his stomach to disappear.  If it meant any of that, he’d do it.  And he’d do it well.  Still, a part of him regretted pressing the ‘Send Call’ button.  Mainly because when the phone connected, he had no idea what to say.

“Hm?  Hello?”

The urge to crush the phone against the table, or throw it out the window, grew exponentially. Emily noticed the paleness on the boy’s face accompanied with an expression that resembled a gaping fish. Frowning, she kicked his shin under the table.

“Ow, why the hell did you do that?”  Neku demanded, not amused.  He really wasn’t this hostile all the time, at least not since the Game had ended, but ever since she had met him, she had gotten on his nerves in every definition of the word.  Acting all high and mighty and powerful and just like him –

“…Neku?”

Oh right, phone.  That was far more annoying than this stranger ever could be.

“…Uh, yeah?”

Emily smiled, thoughtfully, and went back to her coffee, pretending not to listen in.

“Who gave you this number?”  It was a complacent, indifferent hum, at best.

Neku’s anger inexplicably grew.  “Who gave you the right to make me Conductor?!”

A pause.

“Make you what, now?”

“Jesus, Josh!  This isn’t a time to play stupid or victim! My life is on the line over here and—”

“Where are you exactly, Neku?”

“Does it matter—I asked you a question, stop trying to avoid it!”

“As meaningful as this reunion is, it’s pertinent you tell me where you are, Neku.”

“Josh!  Straight answer!”

“You first.”

Neku huffed at the phone, nearly hanging up.  However, when he felt a chill race down his spine—Was it the Noise?  Had they found him?  Why did they want him so much?  Wasn’t this just supposed to be a nice vacation?—he resolved to remain on the line, even though his gut was telling him to end the call right away.  
“…New York.”

“….You’re out of Shibuya?”

“No, that new ramen place past the Scramble.  Of course I’m out of Shibuya.  I’m visiting my Aunt,” he grumbled, absently rubbing his temples, trying to postpone a headache that would inevitably hit hard.

“That’s not good…”

“Well gee, I didn’t know that already,” Neku sighed. “Answers, now.”

“Whose phone are you calling on?  Is it Jadie’s?”

“…Who?  Wait, no, why is that important?  I asked you why you made me Conductor, damnit. Can you just answer?”

“Then Emily.”

It was like talking to a brick-wall.  “Straight.  Answer.”

“I didn’t make you anything, actually.”  A faint giggle followed, and then a, “You did that yourself when you beat Megs.  I had no part in it.  Mm… Though, I don’t really mind it that much, considering that you were my dear, dear partner.” It was sickeningly, falsely sweet.

He felt like he had stepped into a living nightmare.  “I had to do that!  Besides, you made a stupid bet with him.”

“You’re still the one that caused his Erasure.”

There was a long pause as Neku's grip tightened on the phone.

“…I didn’t accept this.  I don’t want this.”

“Beggars can’t be Choosers.  If I remember correctly, weren’t you the one a few years ago that wanted to see me again, hm?"

“…That was before I realized you were an ass and you weren’t going to show up.   I also realized how angry I still was.”  Even if you saved Shibuya.  Even if you gave everyone a second chance.

“Oh?  Do you hate me then, Neku?”

A twitch.  He opened his mouth to snap, but he fell short of words.  He couldn’t say it.   Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t.  Because it just wasn’t true.  “No,” Neku said through gritted teeth. 

“Good.  Because you need to return ASAP.”

“What?  No, I’m not.  I’m here on vacation.  I’m not returning just because you told me to—” Neku began but was cut short when the phone was yanked back. 

“Hate to break up the lover’s spat but I think it’s necessary.” Emily had seized it from Neku and was lounging back in the chair, arms crossed behind her head, balancing the phone on her shoulder. “Hey, Josh~  Hm?  Oh, I’m doing fine, you’re too sweet.  What?  Oh, yeah, I found him in Times Square earlier.  The Noise were after him like hotcakes.  What?  Yeah, I totally did.  Nah, you don’t have to thank me, it’s just my job.  Besides, Boss would be pissed if I let another Conductor get erased under my watch.  … What?  Yeah, yeah.  I know.  He is cute.  Good choice.  …Yeah, we’ll pay for it.  Good luck convincing him, though.  He’s pretty hot-headed.   … Huh?  No, I said hot-headed, but I guess he is pretty hot.  Hee~  … Okay, okay.  Here.”

Neku’s brain had shut down at that point, and he didn’t register Emily handing him back the phone until it jabbed him in the cheek.   With a scowl, he took it back and uneasily lifted the headpiece back to his ear. “What now?”

“Emily is going to have you on a plane back to Shibuya in the morning.”

“What?!  What the hell am I going to tell my Aunt?!”

“…That your life is hinging on this plane-ride, and that your dear friend needs you back, lest his poor, fragile heart be broken from despair?”

“Josh that’s… no,” Neku groaned and closed his eyes.  “I already told you, I’m not going back until Fall.”

“You’ll be erased.”

“No, I won’t.  I’ll avoid the Noise.”

“Avoid?  And how do you propose you're going to do that? I didn't know you liked to live that dangerously, Neku.”

“I just got here.  I’m not going back.”

“You’d rather be killed?”

“….That’s…”

“Tell your Aunt something came up back home and you have to return.  Surely she’ll understand?”

“I don’t want to lie to her.  Especially for you.”

“How you wound me.”

Neku was practically seething at that point, but on the outside, he just looked defeated.  And drained of energy.  “I hate you for this, asshole.”  It was an empty statement.  Damnit, he was so tired.

"But you already said you didn't."

Neku twitched.  "...It negates what I said earlier."

Emily couldn't resist a soft snort of amusement from across the table.  Idly, she began twirling her hair, looking far too similar to the jerk Neku was on the phone with.   Could this get any worse?   

"If you're that concerned about lying to your Aunt, of all people, then ask Emily to imprint her.  It's not that difficult, you realize."

"...No one is imprinting my Aunt," Neku grumbled defiantly, brows furrowing.  "I'll tell her myself.  Don't know what I'll say to convince her, but--"

"As touching as this sob story is, I have business on this end.  Sorry to cut you short, but you know how it goes.  Or at least, you will when you get back, I suppose."  The sarcasm and venom was all but dripping from his voice.  "Try not to get Erased on the way, hm?  I'd hate to be without a Conductor again."

"Screw you too."

With a sigh, Neku ended the call and handed the phone back to the smirking teenager.  Emily puckered her lips and held her hands dramatically over her chest, clutching the phone tightly, as if swooning.  Neku could only gawk in confusion.   

"What are you doing...?"

"This is better than those crappy Twilight books," she cooed, eyes fluttering.  "The love between a Conductor and Composer, how scandalous!  How unheard of.  I bet the Higher-Ups will love this. Kid, you're just bunches of drama!"

Neku's face instantly scorched a rare shade of red.  His ears burned and he choked on air.  "W-what?"

"Seriously. You two," she sighed and dropped the act.   "Here, lemme call Jadin and I'll set up the arrangements with her.  ... Unless you wanted to talk to her yourself?"

"Er...I Guess?"  Once again, too much was happening too fast, and Neku felt himself sinking lower into his collar, barely able to resist the urge to turn up his headphones.  He could deal.  He could be strong.  Once his headache went away, anyhow.

Emily smiled toothily and began rapidly scrolling through her numbers.   After a moment or so, she slouched back in the chair and propped the phone to her ear.  Neku could hear it ringing from across the table.   Two rings later the call was connected and Emily was toying with her hair once more.

"'ello, boss?"  A pause.  "Yeah, we've got a sliiight problem over here.  ...Huh?  Oh no, nothing like that.    Just a  Conductor.  Accidentally came over here.  Long story but..." There was a long pause and Emily twitched.   "Hey, you don't have to yell like that.   Geez--  Fine I'll pass it to him."

Neku awkwardly took the phone again, headache pounding ferociously.  If this Composer was anything like Josh, he was going to slam his head against the nearest hard surface.  "....Hello?"  

"Can you explain to me why a Conductor felt brazen enough to --" There was a long pause. Neku was wondering if he was ever going to get out of Starbucks at this rate. "....Neku?"

Neku jerked up without warning, nearly knocking over the table.  His knees hit the underside.   "...Aunt Jay?"

Emily blinked.    And blinked.  And then nearly spat out her drink.  "What, seriously?"

"...Neku.  Since when have you -- How long --  Dear, why didn't you tell me?!"

Suddenly, the room was spinning and Neku's stomach knotted even further. The urge to pass out was strong and he gripped the edge of the table as tightly as he could. "...I'm coming home.  I'll meet you at the apartment in a few hours?"

"Yes, dear.... that's fine..."

Neku hung up and handed the phone wordlessly over to Emily.  Her eyes remained bugged out and she gawked.  "Seriously.  You're Jadin's nephew?   Man, this really is better than Twilight. No wonder the drama is strong with you."

Neku shot her a slight, half-hearted glare and got up to leave.   "Later."

"What, already, why--?"  He shook his head and left without another word.  All Emily could do was pout.

 ••••••••••••

When Neku returned to the apartment that night, he slumped against the door and delayed complete entry.  He sucked in a few breaths and allowed the day's events to wash over him.  Noise.  Reapers.  Games. Conductors... His Aunt was New York's Composer for god's sake and -- and most importantly, he was Joshua fucking Kiryu's Conductor.  His hands balled into tight fists of aggravation and he forced himself off the door.  He hadn't asked for any of this and here he was, having all of it shoved at him in a day's time.   It wasn't fair.  None of it was.

"Neku?"

He winced.  "Yeah, it's me."

Jadin appeared from the kitchen.  Her usually pinned up hair was down long, curls kissing her shoulders.  Her usually exhausted visage from the passage of time was instead filled with youth and brilliance.   The facade was off.   "Neku, I..."

He shook his head and awkwardly allowed his eyes to meet the ground.  "Are you really...?"  
   
"How do you know about this?"

"Emily --"  "No, Neku, the Game.  How do you know about the Game?"  Neku winced a second time.  "Didn't you hear what she said?  I'm a --"  "Not that either, Neku.  ... I want to know how."  There was a slight tremble to her voice.  Neku fought back the urge to run and allow his music to consume him in a place where Reapers and Games did not exist.  "Long story.  ...Kind of got killed a few years ago.  It's ... I'm over it."  "You just don't get over that sort of thing," Jadin reasoned and took a cautious step over.  "Neku, look at me."  He risked a look up.  "Yeah?"  "Why did you take the job?  I never wanted this for you.   Your Mother and Father purposely kept you away from here because of this.  Because they knew about this.  They didn't want you involved.  They didn't want you knowing about this sinful job they despised.  Neku...why would you--"  Neku felt rage inexplicably boil in his veins and he felt his face burning.  "I didn't choose this, damnit!"

His parents knew about this, too? Had everyone known, all along, and purposefully left him in the dark? The poor kid that died and went through hell? The kid that could have benefited from having someone there that understood him.  "Then how...?"  "..I got the last Conductor erased, okay?  I didn't mean to.  It was the only way to bring Shiki and the others back..   My friends were counting on me.  Hell... I was counting on myself.   I didn't know..."  He closed his eyes.  "I wanted to live."  "Have you met your Composer, then?"  She shifted awkwardly, reaching out to place her hands on his shoulders.  "If this happened a few years ago, Shibuya must be under a lot of stress for you not to have known.  Were you never told, dear?"  Neku sighed.  "Oh, I know him," a mutter.  Jadin blinked.   "I take it that's--"  "He never tells me anything.  The jerk thinks it's okay to not talk for two years and then suddenly I'm his Conductor?  It doesn't work like that.  He can't always get what he wants.  This is my life.  Not his.    Damnit, I..."   His hands came up to tug at his hair, trying to fight back the urge to run again.  Her arms engulfed him into an impromptu hug.  "...I understand."  
   
Neku breathed out, frustration washing over him.  "...I don't want to go back.  Not yet."

"...I wasn't aware you were a Conductor.  It's not safe here."  There was sadness in her eyes, sadness in her voice. "I really do love having you here, dear, but I don't want you hurt."

Neku winced a third time; he had been expecting that.  "...Yeah, I know."  A weak shake.  "I'm not ready for this."

She nodded.  "No one ever is, really.  Not the sane ones, at least."  She pressed a kiss to his forehead.  "I'll call your Composer tonight and set up the plans.  ... I'll tell your parents something came up about the Game.  They'll understand.  I'll tell them you're clueless still so they don't badger you."

"...Thanks."  He averted his gaze as she stepped away.   

"...I'll also make it a point to tell Shibuya to go easy on you."

A weak scoff.   "Good luck with that."

She laughed softly.  "Doubting a Composer, Neku?"

He shook his head.  "No.  I realized that that was a bad idea years ago."

She smiled lightly and nudged him in the back.  "Go rest.  I"ll drive you to the airport tomorrow and you can ask as many questions as you'd like on the way, huh?"

He nodded; it was going to be a long night.

  
 ••••••••••••

The whirring of Shibuya had never felt so comforting and so foreboding as it did when he returned.  His eyelids were heavy as was his heart.  Each step he took felt like he was walking closer towards an ominous death.  But he really shouldn't have been afraid of death at that point, huh?  Not with his Aunt being a Composer, becoming a Conductor himself, having died twice...  This should be normal by now, right?  Then again, like Jadin had said, it was never normal for the sane ones.  He couldn't help but wonder if Joshua ever fit into that category or not.

Jadin had explained a few things to him on the ride to JFK.  About the Game, about the position as Conductor, about the rules, the power.  About being able to live a real life.  He learned that the bubbly, and a bit annoying, Emily had once died herself, and instead of letting her fall victim to the Noise, she became Jadin's Conductor.  It was by fate. Neku couldn't help but wonder if the same had happened to him.  If he hadn't taken the position ... hadn't accidentally got it...  would he have been Erased in order to save everyone else? Had his illegal entry into the game lined him up for Erasure?

Whether it was by chance or not, Neku ended up near Hachiko.  The plane ride had given him a lot of time to think.  About the past two years and those three weeks.  They had been hard on him.  Hell, nothing really had been more challenging than what he went through.  Whether he was ready to admit it to himself or not, he had grown during that time.  Those three weeks had done him good.  He had grown as a person and expanded his horizons.  He had trusted someone, saw that trust break with a bullet, and he had -- forgiven.

There was a bitter taste in his mouth as he thought that over.  Forgiven...  Had he really?  After everything Emily and Jadin had said, after two years of thinking it over, realizing he didn't hate the asshole ... had he really forgiven him?  Perhaps.  In the safety of his own mind, perhaps he could declare such openly.

Neku slumped back up against the statue when he arrived.  His eyelids dropped shut and he sucked in a deep breath.  Shibuya tasted different than New York.  Absently, he wondered when he'd get the courage up to go see Joshua.  When he'd finally accept what had befallen him.  He couldn't live forever in ignorant bliss, even if he wanted to.  The past few days had taught him that.

"You really are a creature of habit, aren't you?"

Somehow, Neku wasn't surprised.

"...Like you're one to talk,"  Neku said in a mumble, keeping his eyes shut.  He blanked out the background noise and focused on the footsteps nearing him.  It felt surreal.  Had he slipped into the UG?...   That made sense.

"Just for your information," the voice began again, growing steadily closer, "I didn't show up two years ago for a reason."

"I know; it's because you're a dick."

A giggle.  "My, my, always one to jump to the worst conclusions."   

A halfhearted chuckle.  "Fine, what is it?"

"Your Entry fee."

Neku paused, cracking open an eye.  Shibuya was eerily silent as she watched her Composer and Conductor.  "...My what?"

"Entry fee."  Joshua shrugged and took a step closer, hands in his pockets.  "You really didn't know?"

There was a beat of silence before, "What entry fee?"

"Our final game," Joshua said with a slight huff. "Are you really that forgetful?"

Neku bit his lip.  "I don't ... that had an entry fee?"

"All Games have fees, Neku. You lost, so it was kept from you."

"What? That makes no sense, Josh."

Joshua stared at him straight out, unamused.  Neku was about to growl in frustration, but when it hit him, he blinked.  He was a bit slow on the uptake sometimes, but not that slow. His jaw slacked, his heart beat irregularly, and he felt weak on his feet all of a sudden.  

"You're kidding."

"Honestly, I was touched.  If not a bit annoyed, but touched."  A smirk and he took a deliberate step closer.  "Of all the things, Neku.  I didn't realize you valued seeing me so highly."

Neku's face burned a dark crimson.  "Yeah, because I wanted to deck you when I saw you again!" he growled.

"And you haven't yet, why?"

Neku flushed a deeper red and looked away.  "...Because, idiot."

"Because?"  Joshua drawled, tilting his head.  "You're being vague again."

Neku twitched.  "Because maybe I... oh forget it."  He lifted his gaze again.  "You couldn't have told me sooner about this?"

Joshua shrugged.  "I frankly didn't know myself.  I wasn't interested in appointing a new Conductor any time soon."

Neku snorted.  "That vain?"

"Something like that," Joshua hummed and allowed a smirk to leak onto his lips, the remnants of a smile visible.  "Welcome back, Neku."

Neku slumped further against the statue.  "...Don't think I'm happy about this."  The redness hadn't gone away.  "Just be glad my Aunt explained this to me."

"Oh, I know.  She explained many things to me."  He smirked.  "She also told me to go easy on you."  A soft purr followed.  "I made no promises, partner."

A shiver raced down Neku's spine and he gave a weak attempt at a glare.  "Figures."

There was levity in the air.  "Just so you know, Neku, this doesn't mean I'm afraid of you because you're related to New York."

"Why would I ever think something stupid like that?"  Neku said sarcastically, keeping his gaze on the other, refusing to back down.

"In fact, it makes it all the more fun."

"Fun?"  Neku felt dread scorch over him like a wildfire.  "Fun...?"

"Mmm," Joshua replied with a nod and leaned closer, breath a mere three inches.  "Fun~"

Neku gulped, trying his best to glare.  "I never did like your idea of fun," he began with a grumble.

Joshua giggled and pulled away, but not before reaching out with his hand.  Unceremoniously, he yanked Neku's from his side.   Neku emitted a cross between a yelp and a holler.   "Dude, warn me before you--"

 Joshua giggled softly and the rush of Shibuya's Music to flood through the area.

There was brilliant light.  Brilliant notes.  Symphonies, Melodies, sounds... it was breathtaking, gorgeous.  It was Shibuya at its finest, it was Life, it was Everything.  It was Home.  It was ...Josh.  

Neku's breath caught and he stumbled forward, crashing against his Composer's chest. 

"Careful there.  Can't have my Conductor breaking his pretty face now can I?"

Neku's stomach did flip flops as the Music assailed his ears.  His weak form leaned against Shibuya's Composer, and he could have sworn he saw a flicker of white,ethereal feathers.    Joshua cocked a brow and spared a glance at the added weight, about to say something, but was cut short when his Conductor made a soft noise.

"Hm?"

"...Just shut up for once."   And he made no attempt to move.

Joshua merely smirked.  "Welcome home, Neku,"

 

(fin?)


End file.
